The ability to connect with people is one vital social skill that can bring you to a lot of places. Having this ability can even benefit different aspects of your life, especially your relationships with others and your career. It is also good for your brain.

Here are some of the most effective ways to improve your ability to connect with others:

Look for a common ground

This tip may feel challenging if you do not know someone that much but you can rest assured that you can still find your common ground. What you should do is to listen intently to what the other person is saying. That way, you can identify whether you have a common ground – be it on a favorite band, team, or sport. The goal is to listen and observe to find out if there is something about him that you can use to bond and connect.

Pay close attention to your conversations

Note that attention serves as oxygen for different kinds of relationships. That said, make it a point to be present and give your full attention whenever you are talking to someone. Show them how engaged and interested you are in the conversation. Ask questions and follow-ups for clarifications.

Also, make it a point to listen intently and observe body cues and facial expressions. Do not make the mistake of breaking the built connection by making your mind wander, checking your phone, or doing anything that may distract you.


You also have to develop empathy. It is an incredible trait designed to help you establish better social connections. The goal is to be able to feel other people’s emotions. With that specific ability, those around you will feel connected to you. You have to hone your natural ability to feel the feelings of others whenever they express emotions.

Have full control over the tone of your voice

Note that in every conversation, the tone matters a lot. Most people have the tendency to react to the way you deliver your message first before hearing the actual content. If you use the wrong tone of voice, then they will most likely react negatively, too.

For instance, if your tone is strident, shrill, or booming, then the person you are talking to may also feel threatened and defensive. To avoid that, hone your ability to control your voice when talking. You should use the appropriate tone for the message you intend to deliver so you can connect to others more effectively.

Take time to practice your social skills

Just like any other social skill, you also need to practice the way you communicate with and connect to others. Make it a point to use your social skills as much as possible. It could be by communicating with your relatives. You may also want to practice by interacting with some strangers.


Aside from the mentioned tips, your social skills can also improve by raising your confidence. By improving your confidence, you can easily interact with people since it can lead to a more comfortable conversation.

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Psychology today: The 7 Habits of Socially Connected People

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